Top 10 Things Women Want You To Do In Bed

From talking with female friends informally, I know there are a few things which almost EVERY woman wishes men did more of in bed. Here are the top 10:

1. GIVING HER AN ORGASM BEFORE INTERCOURSE STARTS

This is far and away the biggest thing women wish men did more of in bed. Most men don’t do this – instead, they clumsily plow straight to intercourse as fast as possible. 

Woman in bed
This means that “foreplay” usually consists of a few minutes of obligatory kissing, followed by a few minutes of obligatory breast stimulation, followed by a few minutes of obligatory cunnilingus until the ultimate goal of intercourse is reached. This isn’t what women want! If you can give her an orgasm before you penetrate her, then it’s GUARANTEED to be good sex in her book, even if you don’t last as long as you’d like. And on top of this, giving her an orgasm will make her more responsive and MUCH more likely to have another orgasm during intercourse. Sex becomes better for you, and for her.

2. PAYING ATTENTION TO NON-OBVIOUS EROGENOUS ZONES

Most men only pay attention to the “obvious” spots on a woman’s body when trying to give her sexual pleasure, like the breasts, clitoris and g-spot. But women don’t want you to ONLY pay attention to these spots … they want you to pay attention to their WHOLE BODY. 

This is because there are 16 other “hidden” erogenous zones on her body which can give her pleasure, and which can actually make her MORE sensitive to vaginal stimulation. Most men don’t know about these … but if you’re one of the rare men who does, then she’ll be screaming your name in pleasure.

3. LASTING LONGER IN BED

We’ve been told that “women don’t mind if you don’t last that long in bed, as long as you’re good with your fingers” and that it’s OK for a man to only last a few minutes in bed. This is a big steaming heap of BS. 

Women HATE it when a man shoots off too soon because it prevents them from having orgasms. How would you feel if a woman got YOU close to an orgasm, then all of a sudden stopped, rolled over, and went to sleep? 

You need to know how to last 30 minutes in bed AT THE MINIMUM. If you really want to drive women wild, then you should learn how to last over an hour in bed. And of course you can have a “quickie” once in a while, but most of the time women will need a minimum of 30 minutes of intercourse to have multiple orgasms.

4. TEASING HER UNTIL SHE BEGS FOR IT

From many conversations and interviews with women I know the typical man in bed does almost no teasing. He just plows forwards directly to his goal of intercourse with no finesse, just doing the minimum necessary to get to penetration. 

What women want is for you do build up to a sexual action with teasing until she’s practically begging you for it. THEN give her the gratification. For example, with oral sex most men just dive right in. What would turn her on much more is if you kiss up her inner thighs, and breathe warmly on her vagina. Then, so lightly she can barely feel it, run your tongue over her clitoris. 

Do this until she’s pleading with you to give her more and THEN give her the gratification. She’ll enjoy it about a hundred times more. This leads into the next things women want more of in bed, which is…

5. MORE ORAL SEX

I’m constantly amazed by how many men have told me that they don’t give women oral sex that often, or that they don’t do it at all. The justification which I’ve heard so many times is “it’s OK, I’m good with my fingers.” 

This is like a girl telling you “I don’t give blowjobs … but it’s OK, I’m good with my hands.” It’s just not the same. If you know how to do it right, giving her oral sex is the fastest and easiest way to give her orgasms. Plus, once you make her finish through oral sex she’ll be MUCH more responsive during intercourse … and much more likely to go down on you. Give your girlfriend plenty of oral sex, and she will love you for it.

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7 Things men are perfect at

There are some things that men can do and women can't. There are many other things that women can do and men can't.

Like giving birth for instance. But, aside that, here's a compilation of seven things that men are so perfect at, that they can be really annoying. Enjoy!

Kissing in bed

1. Sexy morning voices: This one is definitely tops the list. Men have such seductive baritones when they wake up in the morning, while we women end up croaking like frogs. Although we are quite sure that the sexy 'morning voice' is directly proportional to the sexiness quotient of their normal voices, unofficial research has shown that men with reasonable voices end up with super sexy morning voices as well. Let's also imagine a George Clooney like face to go with that voice. Sigh.
   
2. Ability to give comforting hugs: There's no denying it. Embracing a man is like hugging a life size teddy bear. Only warmer. And human. Not only does everything feel like it will be OK, the world seems so much safer in that embrace. Know what's even better? The hug comes with a surplus - don't you just love the way they smell your hair?
   
3. Their uncanny knack of pissing you off and making you feel good at the same time: Alright, moving on. Only a man can achieve that impossible task of pissing you off and making you feel great at the same time. A classic example would be when a man watching a woman give birth says, "Does it really hurt that bad?" and then looks at your annoyed expression and immediately chirps, "But, I am sure you'll be brave honey." Well, at least he's thinking about having kids with you right?
   
4. Saying something completely inappropriate and still is charming : This one is a classic. And no, we're not talking about the cheesy pick up lines that go something along the lines of "do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again." We're referring to the smooth talkers here.
   
5. Ability to eat like a pig and not feel guilty about it: Ever seen a teenage boy wolf down an entire pizza by himself? Or a fully grown man helping himself onto a fourth helping of biryani? Heck, have you ever heard a man say he's "full"? Maybe they are blessed with excellent metabolism or maybe they are just built that way, they can eat gigantic quantities of food, and still work it off. We envy you for not having to worry about cellulite on your hips and thighs.
   
6. Their ability to fix things: We're not just talking about your feelings here ladies, we're referring to everything from light bulbs and fuse wires  to your personal computer and your mobile phone. Can you imagine what would have happened if they thought the 'chip' referred to Lays?
   
7. Gods of gaming: This one is again a given. They can beat women hands down in most videogames (unless we're talking about something that involves too much pink and needless to say a Barbie). In the words of one very wise man, "Men can destroy women at video games. Destroy!"

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5 Amazing Sex positions you don't want to miss

It's time to upgrade your sex life, and to get your partner turned on like never before.
We already knew that women love sex, but have we ever thought of sex positions women really enjoy or feel comfortable while reaching orgasm? There are many sex positions out there, only some of them give more pleasure to women.
Women are always ready to accept and enjoy men's favorite sex positions but women seldom ask for their favourite position(s). The time has come for men to understand what women really want in bed. Remember, great sex happens only when there is a smooth balance between pleasure and comfort.


We bring you five amazing sex positions you need to explore and women always wanted to have.

1. Get dirty with doggy style: Women definitely enjoy doggy style. It is probably one of the best sex positions, and also the most arousing position for men. Make sure to perform this style with intimacy and pleasure.

2. The overused style, missionary position: No doubt, the man-on-woman position is the most common one. It's boring but sex mostly begins with missionary position, and women still like it. In this position women get more intimate with their partners through eye contact.

3. Women like riding, cowgirl style: It's a big turn-on for both the sexes, and perhaps the sexiest sex position. Sometimes women like to dominate men during sex. In this position women can move back and forth and stimulate their G-spot for a big orgasm. You may also try reverse cowgirl position.

4. Get more intimate with spoons position: Side by side sexual position is one of the most comfortable sex positions, and it can really last long. Get naughtier by doing some dirty talk while you can.

5. Out of control, the standing position: Sometimes women want to jump out of the bed and play again in standing position. In this style, she sits on a surface and he thrust her from the front as deeply as he can, and in all likelihood gets the chance to hit the G-spot. Try this position in the kitchen or on a tabletop.

Simply go ahead and give your girl the most amazing orgasm of her life.

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5 ways to tell that a woman likes you

Life is short. So when you're out on the town meeting new women, no point in wasting time. How can you tell which ladies really welcome seduction? What clues do they give off? How can you tell which girl will be interested in you ? It can get very complicated when it comes to reading the signs a girl is sending. Mostly these signs consists of eye movements, body positioning, way of talking, pitch of talking and much more. Here's a guide to the things they say and do that mean they like you.


She makes eye contact: If you haven't met yet but catch her looking at you then glancing away, then checking back to see if you're still looking at her ... this is a sign, gentlemen! Even better: She keeps you in her keen peripheral vision (8 to 4 o'clock) or dispatches her friends to covertly track your moves. Yes, this sounds totally juvenile, but it never changes - no matter how old she is. Just make sure she's actually staring at you, not the Mahendra Singh Dhoni look-a-like next to you (or Dhoni himself, because nothing's more embarrassing than responding to her glances with your best sexy look only to find you're standing under the TV set during a good game).

She smiles, tells you her name and starts throwing off physical signals: Good signs are that she's ruffling her feathers: hair fluffing, twirling, extra giggling, strutting or wiggling around. And think you're so sly sneaking a peak at her cleavage? Dummy - she was letting you look. Meanwhile, is she politely shooing away people who drift in to interrupt? That's fantastic! She's trying to keep the party to two.

She searches for commonalities: Any. Thing. At. All. Favourite sweets you had as a kid, water sports, late-night sitcoms. And if you really seem to have nothing in common? She says, "Wow! I've always wanted to try that", regardless of whether you're going on about shark-cage diving or a pottery class. But if she frowns at you blankly, clearly having no clue what you're talking about, move on. She might actually do the moving on for you by enlisting her wing girl, introducing you both as lovers of water parks/Juicy Fruit/"Seinfeld", then diving off to the bathroom, never to return.

She touches you: That may mean she touches your shoulder when she leans in to talk or gives you a friendly jab in the ribs. Subtly test waters by letting your knee rest on hers. She lets it stay there? Score! If she's taking great pains not to let any part of her body linger near yours or if she recoils abruptly at your touch, even by accident, move on!

She's taking the interaction to another level;  By a) clarifying that she's talking about an ex-boyfriend, not a current one, when she says "we", b) asking open-ended questions about you that require long answers, and c) dissuading you from leaving and going to the next party (or at least being very forward in opining that you should come back if it's rubbish).

Content courtesy: Men's Life Today, India

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Is Your Date Into You?

It’s no secret that people spend a large portion of their time with a first date wondering, Does this person like me? And while you would think the signs would be clear, all too often they’re not. Even if your date has been smiling up a storm or raptly listening to your views on alternative fuel, he or she could just be acting interested and secretly hoping the evening will end soon. But that’s not to say you need to be in the dark about your date’s true feelings. It turns out there are many signals your date may send that give away what’s really going on. Here are some of those subtle signs that, at first glance, might seem like nothing… but could mean there’s a real connection and raging chemistry between you two.

Your date says your name more than usual.

Maybe your date says your first and last name, like, “So, Michael Malone, you up for a night cap after dinner?” Or maybe your date says just your first name three times, like “Jenna, Jenna, Jenna.” Either way, it can be a sign that your date feels so much chemistry, he or she can’t help but connect with your closest possession: your name. But only if your name is said in an enthusiastic way—not in a flat tone like the person behind the counter at the DMV. “Saying someone’s name is like a sign that you’re testing the magic you’re feeling, because you almost can’t believe they’re real,” says body language expert Patti Wood. “It also subconsciously elicits immediate focus from the person whose name is said,” says Wood, which is more proof of the chemistry: If your date is into you, he or she wants your full attention.

Your date squints at you.

If you watch reality dating shows like The Bachelor and all the rest, when one party harbors a crush on the other, they’ll give each other a cute little squint, usually followed by a smile. What gives? It’s an unconscious bit of body language that shows the person is searching for more info about you. “Squinting is typically a gesture of searching deeper into something or testing it,” says Wood. “The same way you’d squint at a diamond to see if it’s real, squinting shows you’re focusing harder to be sure it’s not just a mirage.” And that, she says, is a great sign. That coy little spy tactic shows that your date likes you so much, he or she is looking more closely to see if you could possibly be as great as you seem. (Obviously you are!)

Your date asks the “why” and “how” questions.

During dinner conversation, any polite date will ask you factual things about your family like, “So, do you have brothers and sisters?” But that’s not necessarily a sign they feel chemistry with you. It is a sign of chemistry, however, if they delve deeper and ask more probing questions. As in, “So, how did you get interested in accounting, anyway?” And “Why did you decide to move all the way across the country?” That’s one of the ways Jennifer Santana, 29, first noticed that she and her current boyfriend were clicking. “He asked questions about my family — not just the same old questions, but things like, ‘What are your parents like?’ People on first dates don’t really ask these kinds of questions unless they have some intention of meeting them some day.” These challenging questions are a strong sign that the person you’re with is seriously interested in you and not just making polite chit-chat.

Your date gets quiet midway through your time together.

Rather than taking your date’s silence as a sign your date has lost interest, it could actually be the opposite: Your date may be feeling such a pull toward you that he or she is lost in thought about it. “Sometimes, a person feels such a strong attraction that instead of nodding and following the conversation, he or she is just contemplating you,” says Wood. So the next time your date seems to have missed the whole end of your story, don’t cast the person off too quickly. If you really can’t be sure whether the distraction is a bonus or a sign of boredom, go ahead and ask. “Say to your date, ‘Hey, where’d ya go?’” suggests Sharyn Wolf author of Guerilla Dating. “If the person says, ‘What are you talking about?’ or acts defensive about paying attention, that’s not a good sign. But if you get a grin back and a, ‘Sorry, I guess I got distracted,’ that can be a great sign. It shows this new companion may have been imagining a future outing — or just a future — with you!”

You hear “you’re” a lot.

If your date says to you, “You’re awesome” or “You’re so funny” or “You’re a trip!” or “You’re something else…” then you’re very lucky! Personalizing your admiration or approval of a date means a lot; it’s a strong sign of attraction, while statements like, “That’s awesome” or “That’s funny” don’t mean as much. Using the word you means that the person feels chemistry with you, versus just grooving on your story-telling skills.

Your date gives you a token of the evening.

If your date gives you something you can hold onto and look at later, chances are he or she is feeling chemistry. Jennifer’s date once picked up a pack of matches from the restaurant they were in and said, “Here, for you.” He didn’t say, “Something to remember me by” or “So we’ll always remember this night,” but that, in fact, was the underlying message. It’s a sign that your date wants you to have something to remember him or her by… because clearly this person will be remembering your date as a great one.
By Amy Spencer.

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Best Top 10 Flirting Tips

Some people are natural flirts, but what if you're not one of those people? We've compiled 10 expert tips on flirting that even the most timid of singles can use.

1. Flirting is an attitude :A good flirt is self-confident and not afraid to take risks. Be enthusiastic and positive — it works!
2. Start a conversation : The best opening line is saying hello. Talk about the surroundings, ask a question, ask for help or state an opinion.
3. Have fun : Be playful, light-hearted and spontaneous. Show your vulnerability.
4. Use props : Never leave home without a prop. Props are natural conversation starters. They encourage conversation and others will be compelled to start talking to you. Great props include dogs, kids, unusual jewelry, a fabulous scent, a sweatshirt with your favorite passion, unusual ties, hats, or an interesting book or newspaper.
5. Be the host : Change your behavior from guest to host. You are not a passive person waiting around for romance; instead, you're the welcome committee
6. Make the first move : Move closer to the person you want to meet. Say hello.
7. Listen : You have two ears and one mouth because you should listen twice as much as you speak. Listening is a true art. Your flirting partner will be drawn to you. Everyone loves to be heard.
8. Eye contact : Please look your partner in the eye gently (no more than a few seconds) and then glance away. Don't stare — it's a turn off.
9. Compliment : Compliment your flirting partner. The best compliments have the element of surprise. The "flirter" will know that you really noticed them. Remember, your compliments must be honest, sincere and genuine. When you receive a compliment, the best response is a simple "Thank you!"
10. Smile : It's contagious. Smiling makes you so much more approachable. A smile lights up your face and draws people to you. You'll be a people magnet.
    
    By Fran Greene

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The Chemistry of Kissing

You must remember this, a kiss is just a kiss… hang on a minute. No it isn’t! Because when it comes to dating, a kiss can change everything. Sometimes it’s spine-tinglingly magical and sends shivers from your neck to your toes. And sometimes, well, it feels more like licking a wet fish. While the chemistry you feel on your night out says a lot about how the kiss might go, there are a few things you can do to increase your chances of butterflies, chills, fireworks, and other memory-making moments. Try these lip-smacking tips to make this the first of many kisses to come.

Read when the moment is right

Ever found yourself bumbling and mumbling at the end of a date, wondering if your attempt at a good night smack will be the kiss of death? You’re not alone. “This is, without a doubt, one of the most common questions people ask me,” says Sheila Lee, creator of advice site Kissingbooth.com. So how do you tell if someone would welcome a smooch from you? According to Lee, look for these signs: Is your date making tons of eye contact with you, or standing closer than a friend or business colleague would? If so, says Lee, this person probably wants you to go for it.

If you really can’t read your date, make yourself available for your date to make the move. Lee’s suggestions: Stand close to your date, and let your arm rub against his or hers. Face your date with your arms open, not crossed, to show you’re open to a kiss. Tell your date you had a good time, and ask your date how they felt. And most important? “Smile. A lot of people are turned on by a smile, which shows you’re comfortable with the person you’re with and happy. If your date thinks he or she is making you happy,” points out Lee, “then he or she is likely to think a kiss can make you even happier.”

Lock lips in a place where you don’t have to hold back

Yes, it’s romantic to kiss, say, out on a street corner, but if you’re not the PDA type, you might end up holding back during your kiss. And those unsure feelings could hold back a fireworks-worthy performance. The fact is, kissing signals our brains to produce oxytocin, a hormone that gives us that wonderful, weak-kneed feeling.And the chemicals that produced that feeling prompt you to want to kiss more and create more, like a love drug. To make sure nothing stops that chemistry-building chemical process, make sure you’re in a spot where you feel comfortable and safe, and you’re not worried about what you’re doing or who’s watching: Move inside a doorway, behind a column, into a quiet room, or in the front seat of a dark car. That way, you and your date’s bodies will be free to do what they’re — ahhhhh, sigh, melt — supposed to.

Make eye contact before, during, and after your kiss

Eye contact immediately ups the intimacy level of any sexual act, say experts—so if you’re smooching with your peepers shut tight, you could be missing out! Even recently-single singer Jessica Simpson is a fan of opening her eyes during a smooch. “I love to kiss with my eyes open,” she’s said. “It’s kind of weird because you might only see one eyeball, but it’s amazing what you can see through someone’s eyes. It sounds clichéd, but the eyes really are the window to the soul.” So, before you go for gold, take a few seconds — one Mississippi, two Mississippi — to look at your partner eye-to-eye and establish this is a special moment between the two of you. After you first kiss, pull back, open your eyes, really look at your date, then kiss again. Then, open your eyes once during the kiss to bring the personal touch home.

Feel free to talk a little

Kissing is such a strong language, it’s easy to wonder: Does yapping in between smooches ruin the moment? Not always. In fact, says Michael Christian, author of The Art of Kissing, sometimes words can help ratchet up the chemistry. According to his research, the absolute number one sentence that kissers most like to hear: “You’re such a good kisser.” Following that, he suggests you also say either, “You’re so beautiful,” “You’re so hot,” or “I never want to stop kissing you.” These kinds of words do two things. “One, they show that you’re serious about the particular person you’re kissing, and that it’s truly personal,” says Christian. “Two, it communicates that you’re in the first stage of what your body wishes was a bigger, closer connection. Your feelings are so huge, you’re having to hold back. This says it’s not just a kiss, it’s the start of something incredible.” Let’s be honest, who doesn’t want to know they’re causing that?

Keep your hands to yourself

Sometimes we get so caught up in the human contact of a kiss, we grip our partner’s neck, reach around his or her back, run a hand along a thigh, and do all sorts of a grabby things over and, ahem, under clothing. The only problem? Sometimes all that touching is actually detracting from the kiss, say experts. A kiss, on its own, can sometimes be powerful enough. So, try keeping your hands to yourself for a few minutes, kiss and only kiss, and see how the chemistry takes over.

Don’t forget to use your nose

Some anthropologists believe that kissing evolved from sniffing, as some indigenous cultures rub noses rather than kissing, points out Vaughn Bryant professor of anthropology at Texas A&M University. “Turns out that we have very powerful musk glands right underneath our eyes, and each person has a distinct smell,” explains Vaughn. “Kissing got started by people smelling each other and they would rub across the nose. Touching the lips was a natural outgrowth.” Sampling another person’s scent is a primal urge we share with other animals (including moles, dolphins, turtles and dogs), so take a moment to breathe in your date to kick the connection up a notch.

Convince your date to try the kiss your way

You loved the dinner, you laughed the whole way home, and you were living for the good night kiss… until you got it. Turns out your date doesn’t kiss the way you do. Has your chemistry fizzled for good? No way! So what’s the best way to get your styles more in synch? Don’t ever say, "I don’t like the way you kiss" that will be a big blow to the ego, and will make women self-conscious the next time you kiss.” One option is to make the issue about you, by saying something like, "I like to kiss a little different than most people" which will make them feel at ease (kind of like the old-fashioned “It’s not you, it’s me” line). Or, suggest you both branch out and experiment so that they won’t take the change in kissing personally. Say, ‘I want to try something" and then initiate a kiss the way you want it.

By Amy Spencer

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The 10 Best Places to Kiss

You lucky single person, you - your dating days are full of adventure and kisses shared in dimly-lit restaurants and on street corners. But where, we wondered, are the very best places to lock lips? You already know about the beach at sunset, under the mistletoe and right smack dab on the mouth. Here, more superior smooch sites to check out when you're ready to make out.

1. On a roller coaster : Yes, love has its ups and downs, but that's what keeps it exciting. Kiss at the crest of that first big hill and hang on to each other as you plummet - talk about a rush!
2. On your desk : Research shows that as many as 61 percent of relationships start in the workplace, and 50 percent of office amours lead to marriage (that includes this writer!). So if you're flirting by the coffee machine or bantering at brainstorming sessions and it isn't against company rules, take it to the next level (after hours, please; discretion is important!). Don't have a desk job? Find the nearest supply closet.
3. At a museum : Appreciating a beautiful work of art together can create passion. Why waste it? Give in, whether inspired by Picasso's The Lovers at the National Gallery of Art in Washington, D.C., or a romantic, moving piece at a local gallery.
   
   
4. In the middle of a crowded street : Preferably at rush hour on any given Monday. Life can be mundane and hectic at the same time, but a sweet, juicy kiss can make an average moment special.
5. In a dressing room : Are you the type who's turned on by the idea of a public display of affection but would prefer some darned privacy? The dressing room rendezvous affords the best of both worlds. Plus, it has illicit allure (sneaking someone in where he or she technically isn't supposed to go) without setting off theft detectors.
6. On a pile of coats : Preferably, with a stranger you met at the party. It's a mating rite of passage everyone should experience at least once. Guaranteed to irritate other guests!
7. Upside down : You don't need Spidey skills to pull it off. One person simply sits in a chair and tilts his or her head back while the other person approaches from behind, bends over and plants one. Or try it with one person lying on a couch, head against the armrest, and the other person standing above and leaning over. It's a little awkward, a little weird - and absolutely wonderful.
8. In the backseat : Find yourselves a lover's lane, climb into the passion pit, and neck till you steam up the windows. It's retro romantic.
   
   
9. In a downpour : Yes, kissing in the rain is kind of cliche, but if you haven't tried it, please do. The reason this kiss rules? Everyone else is frantically running for shelter, which makes time seem to stop for the two of you. It's surreal, and very sexy.
10. In bed, while one of you is asleep : You know from fairy tales that the kiss that awakens can lead to happily ever after. There's simply no lovelier way to wake up. As the kisser, however, you're advised to refrain if the kiss is recuperating from a double shift after a bout of insomnia.
    by Nina Malkin

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How to survive a holiday breakup

Break ups are all the more difficult to handle when they happen during festive season, when the rest of the world is busy celebrating.

None of your friends have the time to sympathize and listen to your sad tales. But all is not lost. Here are a few tips to help you get through the holidays.Break up during the holidays can be stressful enough. Before you go into hiding and decide to boycott the fun, get back on track with these tips for handling a split.

Bond with your family

Use your newly found single status to bond with your family. If you were with your ex, you'd have to sacrifice you time with your family to be with him. But now you don't have to. Take it positively by thinking that you won't have to miss out on your family time anymore.

Reach out to friends

When you're single, you often spend much more time with friends, and now is the perfect time to reconnect with your social circle. Spend time with your friends. Make the most of your time with them and let them cheer you up.

Better yourself

Take the time to re-focus your attention on bettering yourself. You have a lot of time to reflect on your life and get things sorted. Use this downtime to focus on you. Read inspirational books, maintain a dairy or work on a creative project. Use this time off to grow your relationship with yourself and begin the New Year with a fresh attitude.

Be of help to others

The best way to put your breakup into perspective is to help others. When you're single you have a great opportunity to share your love with those who need it most. You can volunteer at an NGO event or wrap gifts for underprivileged kids. Helping others will make you feel good and pull you out of your post-breakup rut.

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David beckham and posh's hot marriage tips

Ten years down the line in a marriage, most couples find it hard to keep their relationships steady, but that’s not the case with the soccer ace David Beckham and his wife Victoria. The couple will celebrate 10 years of wedded bliss on July 4 and their love seems to be growing stronger every year.

Now, love psychologist Susan Quilliam has revealed the marriage commandments that keep them together, reports the News of the World.

1. Give each other space - Absence makes the heart grow fonder, especially when living on different continents. While David is playing football in Italy, Victoria keeps herself busy juggling family life and her fashion career in the States.
   "Separate interests keep their love fresh and alive. They make the most of, and live for, the time they spend together," says Quilliam.

2. Forgive and forget - David’s downfall came in 2004 in the form of Rebecca Loos, 32.
   "The Beckhams were obviously able to talk through their problems, learnt to understand one another, and then put it behind them," says Quilliam.
3. Family comes first - The Beckhams have produced a hat-trick of gorgeous sons: Brooklyn, 10, Romeo, six, and break-dancing Cruz, four.
   "When you’re in a loving marriage and know you can weather any storm, having a child can bring you even closer, provide a focus for your love and give you a shared job to do,” says Quilliam.
4. Be each other’s cheerleader - The couple idolises each other.
   “Victoria’s made many sacrifices, but both have genuinely admired and supported the other. Be proud of what your partner does - and tell them so,” says Quilliam.
5. Dress for marriage success - The Beckhams ensure their glamour dial is always cranked up to 11 on nights out.
   “It’s a sign of disrespect to your partner to let yourself go. By taking care of themselves, David and Victoria help keep the lust alive,” says Quilliam.
   
   
6. When two become one - Their penchant for copycat behaviour is a sure-fire sign of a successful relationship.
   “While individuality is important, their ‘matching’ styles, and the overlap between them, shows the world they have a rock-solid partnership - they think, feel and act the same,” says Quilliam.
7. All you need is love - Victoria and David travel thousands of miles to spend one night together.
   “They’re constantly declaring their love. Just saying: ‘I love you’ every day goes a long way in keeping romance alive,” says Quilliam.
8. The in-laws are not the enemy - The secret of a happy relationship is a happy family. With their hectic schedules, David and Victoria would be lost without Sandra and Jackie, their respective mothers-in-law, who regularly travel with the family, acting as babysitters and allowing the couple to spend precious time alone.
   “The Beckhams know the importance of making their mums feel involved and valued. They give the family stability and are a vital source of support,” says Quilliam.
9. Never air your dirty laundry in public - Behind the scenes, Posh and Becks have had their fair share of humdinger rows. But unlike other celebrity couples, they’re careful never to argue or criticise each other in public.
   “David and Victoria have such a public profile that even the slightest hint of tension would quickly come back to haunt them. They never criticise or bad-mouth each other, and if anything negative happens, they close ranks,” says Quilliam.
10. Spice up (Sex) life - Posh is regularly seen scouring LA’s sex shops and stocking up on red-hot goodies. And David often buys sexy underwear for his missus.
    “Love thrives on physical passion. Shared pleasure and sex binds them together and helps them get through stressful times,” says Quilliam

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Why men, women can't think alike

The battle of the sexes starts in the brain's speech centre, Alan Pease tells Bachi Karkaria

Gloria Steinman said, "A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle". Not knowing the secret cycling desires of bassa and sea bass, I cannot vouch for the total truth of this remark. But, since nature didn't use the hermaphrodite earthworm as the model for human sexual wiring, and happily chose to put different circuitry into our two genders, we do have to deal with blown fuses all the time.

Scientists, sociologists and agony aunts have made a lifetime's search and living from the man-woman equation. Through different math, and varying degrees of scholarship, they have arrived at conclusions which ordinary couples discover on a daily basis: namely can't live with, can't live without.

So everyone has had to enter into a conspiracy of convenience and shrug that common ground is unattainable because the thinking processes of the two genders are as manifestly different as their genetalia. The American Jhon Gray passed the buck on a cosmic scale with his seminal book Men Are from Mars, Women are from Venus. The more down to earth British-Australian couple, Allan & Barbara Pease, have produced such bestsellers as Why Men Don't Listen & Women Can't Read Maps and Why Men Need Sex and Women Want Love, apart from The Definitive Book of Body Language.

At the recent Mumbai Fully Booked: The Times of India Literary Carnival, I shared the stage with Allan Pease. The very attractive Barbara was on her own lecture circuit, which is just as well, because the two together would have been too formidable a match.

The main point of conflict according to Allan (and Barbara) is that when women talk, they are merely 'downloading'. Their men, whose thought paths are quite different, think that they are seeking solutions and so offer what they consider to be sage and superior advice. Women, interrupted in midflow, are furious; the men are bemused/ offended; one accusation leads to another; and before you know it, as Allan put it, the 'man is forced to go camping'.

The Pease theory attributes the 'You don't talk to me/ Don't interrupt me/ You don't listen to anything' conundrum to the 'scientifically proven' fact that 'speech centres' in the male brain are few and far between. So, men have to grope for a response. Indeed, they subconsciously have to go on a massive search and self-rescue mission before being able to produce a meaningful sentence. On the other hand, there's such a profusion of speech centres in the female brain that they can unleash a verbal barrage without a second thought.

This is why a five-year-old girl will prattle away, and a boy at that age will be dragged into therapy by his anxious mother. Sons only catch up when their (better) spatial ability and logic is called for, when they start doing math and science.

According to Pease, women in a group will all talk at the same time - and all of them will be hearing, and following, everything, whereas a man will have completely lost the plot. That's because men instinctively wait their turn before speaking (a theory totally disproved every night on our television news channels).

The Peases use the Rodin Factor to explain one more area of malefemale discord. They say that the iconic 'Thinker' could only have been sculpted in the male form. Men need to go up on a figurative rock to think over their problems - and they have to do so in solitude. Another man would never dream of hauling himself up there to help him out. A woman on the other hand, will instinctively clamber up to offer him solace if not solutions, and will immediately be pushed off. Result: sulks and, yes, the camp cot.

It's easy to dismiss much of this as being patronising - or just pat. Yet, if the two sides did accept these basic differences in wiring, there would be fewer domestic explosions. But then how can a woman think like a man? And how could a man ever deign to think like a woman?

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Relationship Advice For Women - Do's and Don't

Most books about relationships are cut-out for both male and female, but we all know that it works differently for both sides so why would you read about something that is not specifically written for you. Here is the relationship advice for you that understands what you are going through right now.

When He’s Annoying
Women must understand that men are indeed annoying. They don’t call, they come home late, they forget things, they don’t want to do things. It makes you wonder why you even fell for that smile and smooth talking when you get a toddler for a boyfriend. You might think you have the worst one in town but here’s the thing: they are all like that. One way or the other that perfect someone of yours is going to act up and it is going to be difficult. What you have to do is simply ignore him when he is like that and get on with your life. As if you notice anything. Most likely he’s just doing it to get a reaction from you. And the moment he sees it is not working, he’ll stop.

When Nagging Doesn't Work
Surely nagging is not included in any relationship advice for women that you can find. But why do women do it anyway, because that is who you are. And that is why you should understand that guys are just guys. By nature they do things that drive women crazy. And so here’s the deal, you make a list of things that bother you and see which ones you can let go of. Imagine how much money you would save years from now for Botox.

Now those that bother you, let him know about it by being straightforward. Do not cry or get too emotional because he would just shut you off like he does when he’s watching TV and you want him to help you in the kitchen. Now even if you had this discussion and it still would not work simply pull back. Men responds to actions not to words. Pretty soon he’d wonder what is going on. Normally by this time she would nag at 40 words per second by now if I did not call her. And pretty soon he would be behaving as he should be.

When He’s Wondering Whether He Should be in this Relationship
If your boyfriend brought up the idea of being away from each other, having a temporary break, or seeing other people then it’s as good as breaking up without the deal of being the bad guy. This also includes if he’s not sweet anymore or is being cold to you lately. If that relationship advice for women has convinced you to make him this fabulous dinner, take a shower and wear the skimpiest outfit you can find, throw away that book immediately. You have been doing your best all the time and the last thing you want to hear is he is thinking about whether you are worth it. Well, I suggest you help him pack now because not because you are nice but rather because you are nice to yourself. You do not need a guy who makes you insecure about yourself and who do not appreciate who you are. This is not some game to convince him that you’re worth it. It’s about you deciding if he’s even worth all this trouble.

Any relationship advice for women would ask you to go after the guy, play nice, don’t say anything that might push his buttons. However, what you must understand is that men don’t need this when they look for a woman that might be the one. Otherwise they could just hire someone to be their assistant. He needs someone that could level up with him, someone he’d be interested with for the rest of his life and being someone that you’re not is the last thing that he needs. Oh let me rephrase that, it’s not what YOU need.

You should:

• Pay him compliments and give him presents (even flowers)
• Introduce him to your friends and don’t ask him to give up his friends
• Ring the doorbell even if you have a key to his door (would you like to be taken unaware in your own bathroom?)
• Go with him to a football game (he shouldn't think that you are going to be a football fan)
• If you bump into your ex, try to ignore him (even if he looks great and you are not over him)
• Tell him how clever he is (at least once a week)
• Not try hard to win his confidence and make him a member of your family -- you are with him because you like him and you should always show it to him
• Never criticize his friends, even if you feel like killing some of them; give him a chance to spend time with them
• Try not to focus on his defects
• Control your jealousy of his children if he’s divorced; - let him spend time with his children

You should not

• Tell him about your past relationships in great detail
• Spy on him -- it’s a sign of distrust and a total lack of self-confidence
• Stop looking after yourself
• Vocalize your admiration for Kevin Costner or Tom Cruise on your first movie date
• Fixate on his past love affairs and give all his girlfriends an angry look -- you should try to make them your allies
• Take your girlfriend with you everywhere just because the poor girl is so lonely
• Date married men because it’s in poor taste and things are going to go wrong
• Try to be his children’s mother: they already have a mother

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